It took me a long time to understand the nature of shadow work, and this was mostly because it is a phrase that is used in a variety of different, and often very vague ways. In many instances, shadow work is defined as the work we do to recognize our shadow side, our darker aspects, with a view to dissolving them or setting them free.  In our mind, we may think we can dissolve shadow with the light, its apparent opposite. This is a fine and very generic definition that unfortunately leads many down the wrong path, albeit a very educational path just the same

Eventually, we learn that light cannot dissolve the dark, simply because dark cannot have form without the light. Dark and light are always together, and present together. When you recognize this, you start to realize that to chase the dark shadow side with the light, is like the dog chasing the tail. The faster you try to chase it away, the faster it catches you again.  Darkness however is not what we are really concerned about. What we are concerned about are the particular shadows that we must, as individuals and as human beings, face with complete responsibility and power. The light casts light on the hidden aspects of ourselves, the corners of the attic that we don’t allow anyone, even ourselves, to see. The light is what shines light not on some abstract shadow or darkness, but on the particular forms that contribute to who you are as a being right now in this instance of space and time and all times.

Shadow work is how you approach your eternal being even in the context and grip of the limited ego.

When we hide aspects of who we are, we immediately create a dichotomy of the hidden and the shown, the darkened and the enlightened.   Hell is a place where evil dwells, and is a place that is dissociated from our egoic identities. Heaven is the opposite and is only a place where ego may hope to go.  Ego meanwhile is in the impossible middle, the limbo-land, stretched between two opposites. It is truly an existence of conflict and torture, if the stretching goes on for too long.  This impossible state of ego is imposed on your life for years and even lifetimes. Ego is mostly in the business of creating a desirable identity to bury the pain or at least make it worthwhile. “Well, I am successful and have beautiful car and a beautiful wife.” Ego always uses its situation in order to make itself feel better, as if its choices and entire existence are worth something.  But while doing this, while creating these stories of success and self-congratulating positive attitudes, it seeks to hide and even destroy all evidence that may prove itself wrong.  It would take an enormous amount of will power and self-love in order to shatter an ego of this strength and nature. Shadow work is always the work we must do to excavate what we have hidden and forgotten about ourselves, as humans and as individuals. But it is even more than this – shadow work is the work we must do to save ourselves from that aspect of ourselves that we have created through banishment into the underworld of the subconscious, and that is an evil that lies within our own being.

So where do we begin? The egoic mind has been clever enough to hide these things from our consciousness, and so too all clues that may lead to it. The ego wants to survive as an illusion, to keep us from the truth and to keep us from dissolving it.  We get to choose: do we want to help ego survive, or do we want the truth?

If you want to truth, the way to begin is to notice what your relationships are showing you in the form of others. The twin flame phenomenon is one of the most powerful examples of this, as your twin will show you (and the person who is your twin is not really conscious of this) the darkest elements of yourself in the form of his own behavior and appearance towards you.  Many choose to believe that this is proof of the evil nature of twin flames.  However, you could just as easily believe that the challenge of the seas to those who wish to invent ships is also evil. Evil is what we perceive is trying to destroy us. The only being that knows that it is able to be destroyed is ego itself. Ego is the foundation upon which we understand both good and evil and that drama between these two plays out in the timelines of earth. However, if we wish to grow and heal, and, as Nietzsche famously put it, move beyond good and evil and into truth, then we must do the shadow work of facing our own responsibility for experiencing the evil that we attract into our lives. If we do this, then we can in fact dissolve that evil from our lives, and in some cases, if we are powerful enough in this shadow work, help others also dissolve it as well. Actually, dissolve is not really the world to use here. What actually happens is that the evil simply disappears. When the great ship is built, the fear of the sea fades into nothingess.

Your twin flame, or your person in your life that is giving you a very difficult time, is like the raging seas. You are destined to face what they are giving you, not in order to suffer, but in order to thrive. In the modern world we have become so fearful of life, and so out of touch with our capacities of creative and thinking beings, that we have forgotten the necessity of difficult challenge, uncertainty, and danger in our lives. The test of manhood in many ancient societies was the test of survival, of being left out outside in a forest all alone, of being left in the freezing cold for days with no food or water given. Can the child survive? If so, they become a man. If not, they should not exist. To modern ears, this sounds evil and cruel. But to an ancient mind, it is more cruel to not teach and test their young men how to face challenge and danger to their very existence.

I have faced, in my life, cancer and the twin flame.  Both are a walk through the fire. These experiences are not about romance or beauty or a means towards admiration. They are hard tests and experiences in my life that have allowed me, in their own ways, to see where I had been inauthentic in my own life, through egoic structures that didn’t serve, through childhood or past life trauma, through participation in collective delusions such as those that the matrix provides. Both cancer and my twin flame gave me space to see where I had been treating myself badly, without respect, and where I had not been honoring who I am and who I have always been. In short, they both gave me the opportunity to take the road that is suitable only to myself and in my own way and in my own time. They are the road that we all must eventually take, which is the discover of our deathless and eternal nature, where fear of death is not even a possibility, because death doesn’t exist.

The only death in this world is the death of the ego. The death of the body is of no consequence whatsoever. But try telling that to an ego that thinks it is a body.

I am still on this journey, discovering things about myself, and my humanity, that are deeply hidden from all to see, things like energetic attachment and projection, ancestral bloodline patterning, and various other shades and shadows that I had no idea about.

There is more mystery to the Self than there are known in its apparent figures and forms. And yet, so many people cling to these little forms in order to feel safe in that knowledge.  But these are only a scratch on the surface of who you and I are. The mystery is so much deeper and greater than anything we could ever possibly know, and yet if we allow ourselves to enter those darker places, we can eventually be witness to all the possibilities of who we are, in every way that seems both possible and not possible at all.

4 Comments »

  1. Shadow work can be a challenging and intimidating process, but it is also incredibly rewarding. It takes a lot of courage and vulnerability to confront the parts of ourselves that we might not like or understand, but it is in these moments that we have the opportunity to grow and heal.

    Liked by 1 person

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